Thursday Things

1. Dear Yahoo!,

This:

Screen shot 2012-12-12 at 12.34.01 PM

is probably not the best way to help people deal with stress. Just sayin.

To be even more thoughtful, the good folks at Yahoo! linked this to an article that tells you exactly how stress is slowly ruining your life, killing you, and making you ugly. Thanks guys! Feeling much less stressed now!

2. I’m a serious dog lover. I call my dog my best fwend, and I’m really only kind of kidding about that. Since my apartment building is lame, I’m poor, and the majority of my time in my apartment is spent sleeping, though, I can’t have a dog of my own right now. Because of that, I vicariously live through the 783827 dog owners I see walking their precious furry friends on my morning and evening commutes to get my canine fix.

566327721861397941_slakfdqo_csource

I see the same dogs routinely on my commute, but one particular dog had been missing for months. I first noticed him sometime in August or so and instantly fell in love. I’m sure he has a real name, but I call him my Floppy Eared Fwend because he looks like such:

146085581634329538_dh49pDIQ_c

*dies* IS THAT NOT THE MOST PRECIOUS THING YOU’VE EVER SEEN??

Anyway.

The last time I saw my Floppy Eared Fwend was the week before my birthday, which was three months ago. For three months I’ve left my apartment every morning filled with hope that today would be the day I was reunited with my Floppy Eared Fwend, and each day I was let down. It’s been a really rough way to consistently start my mornings for a quarter of the year.

On Tuesday night, I was heading to hip hop and thinking about my Floppy Eared Fwend, as I am apt to do whilst walking where I used to see him, when lo! In the distance: a man and a small white dog. With cautious optimism I picked up my pace. Could it be?

Friends, it was. Indeed, my Floppy Eared Fwend and his human passed me on the sidewalk, and it made my day–nay: my year.

Fortunately, I do have a slight sense of social acceptability, so I refrained from grinning like a fool and squealing with glee until after I passed the dog. Regardless, this has arguably been the most exciting thing to happen to me…ever. Or at least this week.

3. It’s no secret that I am hopelessly shout-it-from-the-rooftops in love with my hip hop class. When my teacher was like, “We need an extra rehearsal before graduation,” I could’ve cried tears of joy. I’m not kidding you guys: I spend my entire week looking forward to hip hop. I live for Tuesday nights.

274438171012475715_TgNrAfka_c

Originally, our class was made up of four girls and two guys, but as time has gone on that has dwindled to two girls and two guys. This, naturally, led to my teacher thinking we should pair up for part of the dance, so now, instead of spending “Where Have You Been?” by Rihanna being seductive towards ourselves in the mirror, we’re now supposed to be seducing each other.

For those of you who haven’t had the pleasure of meeting me in real life, I’ll be the first to tell you that I’m about as naturally seductive as tumbleweed. aka not at all.

bobsource

Oh la la!

Naturally for this portion of the routine, I got paired up with the cute guy in the class. We’ve been paired up for several things throughout the routine because we stood next to each on the first day, and you know how those things go–once you find your spot, it’s your. spot. and you end up spending the rest of the class there, so it wasn’t exactly a surprise (nor, if I’m being honest, was it exactly disappointing). However, there’s a pretty big difference between striking a pose with the cute boy and making eyes at the cute boy. Holy awkward, y’all. To make things even MORE awkward, this guy works for a theater company in Chicago, aka he’s an actor, aka HE CAN ACT. My acting career began and ended with a bit role in the 8th grade musical. He makes a living out of pretending to be in love/lust/hate/mortal combat with people. Me…not so much.

176836722838883924_SbVnVbQM_c

My knee-jerk reflex to any highly awkward, embarrassing, or exceptionally uncomfortable situation is giggling like a maniac. Like, for example, the time I scored an own-goal on my soccer team earlier this year, a mere 20 minutes after meeting my teammates for the first time ever. I could not stop laughing. The more uncomfortable and embarrassed I am, the more I resemble a middle school girl.

In case trying to figure out how to contort my face into “alluring” wasn’t hard enough when I was just trying to seduce myself, I NOW have to figure out how to contort my face into “alluring” without bursting out in a fit of giggles. While I’m sure nothing says sexy quite like uncontrollable laughter, I don’t think that’s exactly what my teacher was going for.

For those of you interested in seeing this disaster on stage, I’m graduating next Tuesday night. I’m not going to post the deets on the ol’ blog to keep the crazy stalkers away, but if you’d like to go, feel free to get in touch with me and I’ll provide you with the lowdown. I’ll be signing autographs and accepting flowers after the performance. Lilies are my favorite, but I’m not picky.

Dogs or cats?
Does anyone else out there react to awkward situations awkwardly (like laughing), thus making them even more awkward than they were to begin with?

Advertisements

17 thoughts on “Thursday Things

  1. hahahah i always read yahoo articles and i remember seeing that one, but for some reason didn’t catch the irony of it till you pointed it out. hahahah seriously funny.

    & congrats on hip hop – that sounds so fun, if i was closer i would so come and see you!

  2. God I love your blog. You are hilarious. I also nick-name the dogs I see regularly and wonder where they go when they are gone. Like today I didn’t see the awesome yellow lab on my run. It was weird. Where IS he?

    I try to stay away from articles about how bad stress is… I HATE when I stress out about stressing.

    • Well thanks!

      I just kind of assumed my Floppy Eared Fwend moved away, but then when I was telling my roommate about it she was like, “Oh, I thought you were going to say you found out he died!” That never even crossed my mind! From here on out I’m going to live in a constant state of concern when I don’t see the regular dogs around. Don’t die, fwends! I’ll be so lonely on my commute!

  3. i am a dog lover so i feel you on this. next wed night I will be reunited with my puppy and i couldn’t be happier. see I am that fool that while I run and I see a dog i tend to stare at the dog rather than even notice the human. they probably think i am legit insane. whoops. you do what you have to do. i am an odd ball all around. that yahoo thing is crazy, i mean really let’s add more stress. it is like web md on drugs, without even having to search they have you worried.

    • I’d like to think I make up for my lack of hip hop boy seducing skillz in the dog staring department. I will stare those suckers down with the biggest smile on my face, and I always get so excited when the pull away from their owners to sniff my hand. I get to see my dog next Thursday and I’m so stoked!! My dad sent me a picture of my dog last night and even though he kind of looked possessed by Satan because of how the flash reflected, I still thought he was the most wonderfulest thing ever 🙂 ❤ my bestest fwend so much!

  4. Hahaha! Love that post! I’m just imagining the awkwardness and it makes me giggle. I’m also super awkward in those circumstances! Goodness, I’m pretty sure I’ve had to do that in past dance classes, but all the guys in my classes in school were gay and it was no big deal because we were also all friends outside of class. This, to a stranger, is a whole new level of potential awkwardness. Cheers to you! And good luck in your performance/graduation!

    • Thanks! I mean, I suppose it’s totally possible that this guy is gay…there’s absolutely nothing about him that would imply this, but it’s not like we’ve ever exactly sat down and discussed it (haha that’d make for an interesting pre-class talk!)…so maybe he is? I can at least pretend to myself that he is to make it a little less weird on my end, right?

  5. I love everything about this post. I am the same way about the dogs in our apartment building and get all excited when one is on the elevator with me. Puppies! I miss having a dog.

    And I’m intrigued by your graduation performance. Email me the details?

    • I shall e-mail you!

      All the buildings around me allow dogs, and I get so jealous when I see people walking in and out of them with their pets. My next door neighbor has a cat, but I don’t even know my neighbor’s name, so it’s not like I exactly get to hang out with her kitty whenever I’m in need of some animal cuddling. Someday!

  6. i am definitely definitely a dog lover and my dog had a floppy ear like that! we had to put her down this summer but when i get another dog i’m going to shoot for a floppy eared one because they are the cutest. also your hip hop class sounds awesome and i think awkwardness is the best way to be anyway, so keep on keeping on.

  7. I love both dogs and cats equally. I was always a dog person until one day I stumbled into Anti-Cruelty, saw my little guy, and Ian asked if I could hold him. The next day I started my new life as a cat person. I do want to get a dog someday too.

    I’m very interested in your hip hop graduation!

    • I’ve tried so hard to be a cat person. I think I could be if I found the right kitty. All the ones I’ve interacted with are of the “I suppose I’ll tolerate you if I HAVE to” mentality, and the thing I like about dogs is how they’re all “OMGOMGOMGOMGOMG CAN WE BE BFFS PLEASE?????? All I want is to be loved!!” If I could find a cat like that, I’m sure the two of us would get along swimmingly.

      I’ll e-mail you about graduation as well!

  8. Hahahaha I love this! I’m super awkward too. I totally understand if guys decide to run far away from me hahaha I always make things more awkward. Always.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s