Thursday Things

1. I have a dilemma. One of my best friends from high school is getting married in November (shocking, I know). Yesterday, I received an invitation to her bachelorette party. Given that this is one of my best friends, I absolutely want to be there, both for her and to see other high school friends that I haven’t seen in months.

However.

The bachelorette party is the last weekend in October. This wouldn’t keep me from going to the party…except I have obligations at home every. single. weekend. in November. Going home five weekends in a row seems a bit excessive (not to mention expensive, though it would do wonders for my Amtrak Rewards account!), and doing so would mean missing my last two soccer games, which I’d really rather not do because I paid lots of $$ to be on my team. But she’s one of my best friends! And it sounds like so much fun!

Moving away from home, realistically, was not one of the dumber things I’ve done in my life, but my calendar for the end of the year sure makes it feel that way.

2. Speaking of friends. One of my current roommates is a friend from college. All around, she’s a great person. We’ve got a lot in common, have had a lot of similar life experiences, and on the whole just get each other. It’s wonderful…except she’s a Class A loud chewer.

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 You guys. I can hear her eating when I’m in my room WITH THE DOOR CLOSED. I know for some people this might seem like nothing, but for a misophoniac like me, each night is legitimately a constant battle to not punch her in the face. In case you’ve never heard of misophonia, the New York Times published an excellent article on it in 2011 that describes my daily life to a T. I don’t think there are many people that enjoy hearing others eat, but when you have misophonia, eating sounds literally enrage you to the point of wanting to harm a person. I don’t, obviously, but that doesn’t quell my anger. I’ve found the only way I can deal is either locking myself in my room with my music turned up loud while she’s eating and waiting until like 7:30 to even start making dinner (because I can’t be in the kitchen while she’s eating either, since I can hear her in there), or, if I’m going to be, you know, social, I have to talk without stopping the entire time she’s eating. While I’m sure she’s interested in the play-by-play of the daily behavior of Attractive Mystery Man who gets on and off the train at the same stop I do every day, there’s only so many times you can say, “He spent the entire commute on his iPhone, just like every other day,” you know?

Don’t even get me started on the co-worker who’s taken to eating chips at his desk every afternoon.

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3. It’s Book Club Sunday this week! Hooray for reuniting with blogger friends! This month we read MWF Seeking BFF: My Yearlong Search for a New Best Friend.

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I don’t think we could have picked a better book to read. The author, Rachel Bertsche, moved to Chicago in her mid-20s and found herself BFF-less. Determined to solve that problem, she set out on a quest to find a Chicago-based BFF by going on 52 girl dates over the course of a year. Some went well, some were flops, and Bertsche documents all of them in the book. Most of us bloggers are more or less in a similar position to Bertsche: newish Chicagoans that have graduated college and have found ourselves wondering, “Wait, how are you supposed to make friends when you’re not constantly surrounded by your 18- to 22-year-old peers?” I’ve only been a real world resident for a few months, so I hardly consider myself an expert on the subject, but from what I’ve seen, the real world is not as overtly geared towards relationship building as somewhere like college. It takes a lot more effort (enter volleyball, soccer, and book club, for me), but that doesn’t mean it’s impossible. Personally, I’m more concerned with simply making friends in Chicago rather than a BFF. I’ve never really had a BFF in the sense that after elementary school there has never been one person in my life that I could point to and say, “Yes, that person is my #1 best friend, and I guarantee if you asked her who her #1 best friend is, she would say me.” The book was really interesting, though, and included a good mix of anecdotal advice and scientific, research-based evidence on friend making.

Thoughts on my bachelorette party dilemma? Is it worth going since she’s one of my best friends, or is going home five weekends in a row as crazy as it sounds?
Does anyone else have misophonia? Surely, someone can relate to me and my angst.

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10 thoughts on “Thursday Things

  1. That is a dilemma with the travel! Will you feel left out if you don’t attend the bachelorette party? Will you see her again before the wedding? Why not tell them they all have to come to Chicago? 🙂

    My stepdad eats really loudly and I find it incredibly irritating. But then my husband told me that *I* eat loudly!!! Maybe your roommate doesn’t realize that she’s chewing so loudly?

    • I mean…yes-ish? I never had a group of friends in high school, really, just individual friends, so it’s not like I’ll be missing out some major reunion or something. I think it’s more that I want to be there to celebrate my friend, you know? I won’t see her before her wedding, but it is only two weeks later.

      I doubt my roommate realizes she’s eating so loudly. It’s just not something I feel like I can bring up, you know? It’s one thing to get on someone’s case for things that actually affect all of us, like not cleaning up dirty dishes or something (which she does, thank goodness!). I feel like this is different, especially since I’m SO sensitive to it.

  2. Do you get annoyed with people chewing gum with their mouths open? I was on a flight on Friday and the women on either side of me were doing that and I was losing MY EFFIN’ mind.

    Maybe skip the party if you don’t think you’ll miss out? I have travel 3 weekends in a row coming up and I know that will be cray cray. I cannot imagine 5!

    I loved the book! It inspired me to talk to strangers and make new friends, lol.

    • UGH YES. Oh my gosh. Last week I was on the El on my commute home, and someone walked on my car SMOKING, which I just found outrageous. I changed cars at the next stop because I had no desire to spend the rest of my commute inhaling her exhaled smoke, and on the next car there was someone chewing their gum with their mouth open so loud I could hear it across the car. Worst. Commute. Ever. Haha.

  3. Our son is a loud breather and eater (he’s 13 – it’s part of the deal). This drives my husband nuts. I had fun pointing out your post and telling my hubby that he was the one with the problem. LOL. Plus, when he does start breathing and eating more acceptably we’ll know he likes a girl – for now, I’ll take the loud breathing. Ha Ha!

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